Sunday, November 25, 2007

Finals....

My Final Exams are very near. and as ususal i am not studying for them. as is obvious from the fact that i have decided to blog about it rather than study for it :P
Anyways, I guess the reason I don't study is, first of all i am never in the mood of studying and secondly that we are so busy these days in making projects, meeting deadlines and everything that when we finally do get a day off, we spend it in watching tv, movies or like me chatting and blogging. The last day off i got, i spent it in watching 4 movies, that too Indian.
Computers have become a part of our lives since we are doing bachelors in computer science.
I always plan that after I am done with this project I'll not sit in front of the computer for the whole day. I'll not use the computer during vacations, but I end up using it more than i used it during the projects even.

Wednesday, November 21, 2007

Technicalities

Uff, people can be so technical. I was just going through the blogs of my class fellows at uni, and realized that my blogs are downright boring. well it wasn't a realization, can it if you already know? But the thing is those blogs were highly technical. all with complete codes and words i couldn't even pronounce. Those blogs clearly qualified to be the blog entries made by people who are doing bachelors in computer science and who are nothing short of cheetahs... So when i said i was just going through the blogs, i really meant the GOING THROUGH part as there was nothing i could stick to as there was nothing i could understant.
but really i would love to be like that sometime in the very very near future (don't think that's possible) i would love to know that much about computer science. about programming.....
let's just hope i get there soon enough.

Saturday, November 17, 2007

Another Lost Competition......

Programming Competitions -- You are given a problem set containing programming problems and you have maximum questions in a specified time frame. Three people per group, one computer per group, one problem set per group.
Seems easy?
Think again.

I remember the first time I participated in a Programming Competition, it was in the first semester. One of my friends who had made group with a guy of our class and was one member short asked me to join and I said no. I wasn't good enough, was my reason. But she continued to ask me and I finally said yes.
And we lost that competition. I felt like these two people lost because of me. Because I didn't solve even one problem and both of them solved one problem.
Anyways, we lost and the next year I didn't participate in that competition, and the year after that I did. I participated a bit unwillingly. this other friend of mine badly wanted to participate and I just said yes to get her off the subject, but then when the competition was near, and I had already committed that I would be in her team, then I had to be in her team. We practiced and everything and we lost. Actually we secured the fourth position, but it was an internal competition and the first 3 teams were to proceed to the external competition. and we came 4th. But after that all three of us long to participate in any programming competition that comes in our way, or rather whose way we come in. :P
And on 9-10 of november another competition was held and we participated. 9th was the practice session, which went okay, they gave us pretty easy questions. We faced some problems. We had some problem while submitting our solution through PC^2. It was the first time we were using java in a competition. Before that we used C#. But in this competition C# wasn't allowed (unbelievable for me).
On 10th of november was the final session. We lost. But I didn't feel that bad after loosing as I had before. Maybe it was because 10th of november was my birthday, I didn't want to feel bad, I wanted to be happy on my bday. :)
And after the competition was over, we were still sitting in the lab gathering our things and I was reading the messages i had received on my cell during the competition. One of those three sms was from my friend since 1, Sakina, it went something like -- "It's the 10th of november, the bday of one of my sweetest friend, I had been a fool forgetting her bday so many times, but as time and distance makes us treasure our friends, I true cherish her friendship"
Thanks Sakina, you made my day.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Working in groups

Sometimes I wonder why I didn't make any good friends in University. and I guess I have reached a reason in this last year. It's because of project groups.
All through the 12+ academic years before university, we didn't do any project. I only remember working on one project and that was a presentation in Pakistan Studies. No marks were involved though. 3 of 4 group members worked and we had a good time. Besides that I don't remember any time I had to work in groups. I even didn't like group studies and refused the one time I was offer to join a group study for maths.
Maybe I can't just work with people.
The reason I don't like group studies is I think that my way of studying is very different from others. I am a bit slow.
The group study for maths that I refused some four years back, I don't remember why. But now I think that it might be because that I would take good time to solve a sum while others won't. This taking time is because I can't concentrate very well. I try to though, but I don't really succeed. Sometimes when while I have been working for some two to three hours and I look back to what I have accomplished I realize that it shouldn't have taken that much time but don't know what to do with this concentration problem. Sometimes I think I indulge myself into other activities like while working on the computer I would start chatting or while working if I am listening to songs at the same time I would concentrate on listening or singing to the current song rather than studying :)
See I have again lost the track of thought. I was talking about groups. So since we have joined university all we have to do is work in groups. Group projects, group presentations and in just 2-3 cases even group assignments.
When you work in a group with someone, even you didn't know them really before the project by the end you might now a lot about them.
The problem with me is I can't control my temper. Maybe I want everyone to work like I do. And that isn't possible. Everyone has their own style of working and their very own style of studying, understanding concepts, reaching a conclusion. You can't make them like you. If that was possible it would weave a bigger problem.
I can't handle people. I can't make people work. I'd rather do the work myself. But you can't do everything can you?
I have worked in some very nice groups. But the problem is again my temper.
In this last year of ours, I think I have made more foes than friends, hurt more people than I would have fancied. These groups have created such walls between us. Should it be like this? Not, at all.
I just don't know what to do.
When you are working with people who work when they want to work who don't work when they don't want to work, what should you do with them. Let them be. or make them work in a manner (this manner is a complete mystery to me) that they would think that it was their own idea to start working. what to do? should you shout at them? should you complain? what the hell should you do???

Back Yet Again

Reading other people's blog, i was inspired yet again to continue with my blog. and so here i am.
if i think about topics to write, there are a lot of things that have happened in the recent past that I could share...... Let's see how much I succeed in sharing. because sometimes when i start writting the blog I just don't get enough words to express myself. Is that a problem faced by all???? or is it just me???

I have taken up blogging as this would help me a little bit in my final year project. How? Well the project is based on blogs, that's how.

Khair, what was I talking about?
See again I am at a loss for words.....
So the thing is I try to blog regularly and I enjoy reading some blogs too.. But I am not able to blog a lot ..... I guess this much is enough on the topic "Not being able to blog" :)

Monday, October 22, 2007

Intricate

I try to write blog regularly, but fail miserably. It seems to me that I had written a blog just yesterday but in reality it would be day before yesterday.
Coming to the point, I have dedicated this blog in sharing some feelings that I have been feeling since quite a few days. And that is my incapability of understanding myself. I am not sure if everyone is so complex from inside like i am but i can say that I really am an intricate person. Even I can't understand myself, and I must admit that others won't be able to understand me either, atleast that's what I think. :)
Sometimes i just see someone, and I start disliking them for no particular reason, suddenly i just don't want to talk to them and don't even want to talk to them.
Sometimes i just want to bcum friends with some people, i just want to strike up a friendship with them.
when i think of it, there are some reasons in the background which makes me like or dislike some people but sometimes it's hard for me to pin point those reasons.

okay then
will continue with this later.
very sleepy now
take care
Allah Hafiz.

Saturday, October 20, 2007

Still Worried

I have had a three day off from my university. and still i haven't been able to accomplish anything. it seems like i waste most of my day in chatting or watching tv and yes ofcourse sleeping. and worried as i am, i'm still not doing anything to get myself rid of it. infact, i am giving myself all the more reason to indulge myself in more worries.
If I start thinking about FYP, there is nothing that we have really done.
and it seems to me that I am not working as i should and i am not working as i used to.
May Allah help me. Ameen.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Worried Girl

These days I am worried about a lot of things.
With my last year of bachelors, there are a lot of tensions wandering over my head.
There are a lot of things to study, we only have 4 subjects what yaar we have fyp. and we chose to take such a hard project, that even we ourselves are not sure how we'll do it. May Allah help us Ameen.
Then the 4 subjects are not that easy too.
plus as we are graduating there are things that i should know, softwares i should have exceled by now but as it turns out there are a lot of softwares i don't even know the name of excelling them is another story altogether.
i am not even capable enough of writing a simple document in xml.
doesn't seem that i am doing my bachelors in computer science.
so many depressing thoughts about yourself.
how can you live with it?????

Friday, October 5, 2007

And after a long time I am here to write again. To be truthful, I don't exactly have anything to write about. The reason may be that I have only just begun blogging.
Blog reading is an enjoyful hobby no doubt. You get to know a lot of things, you get to read good stuff, but I am not tooooooo sure about blog writing.

Before this, I was, actually I still am the member of a forum. I joined that forum because I was learning VB.Net (I haven't learnt it completely till now) and wanted to ask questions. So I only started a topic there when I wanted to ask something. Now this is something totally different. So that's why, here I am writing things that don't really make any sense. :)

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

And Pakistan Lost..... :(

Yesterday, I waited the entire day to watch the match against Pakistan and India. The final of World Twenty20. All day long the only thought that captured my mind was this game, the only thing we talked about at the university was this match.
At 5 the match started...... it was no doubt a very good and interesting match,, but then again most of Pak India matches are. atleast for us Pakistanis they are. All we really care about is Pakistan winning against India, no matter what. Even if Pakistan looses every single match against each and every team, but they manage to win against India, for us that would be more than enough, if they win against India, it would be the same as winning the World Cup.
But yesterday Pakistan lost by 5 runs. 5 runs only yaar. The match was so good. At one point, it seemed like Pakistan would loose. But I am a kind of person who is pessimistic about everything else but when it comes to Pakistan cricket, I'll be saying Pakistan would win this match even if it's obvious that from this point they could only loose. And so it was yesterday too. I kept on watching the game (after all they only had to play 20 overs), and Misbah-ul-Haq, the soul of yesterday's match, took the match to a point where only 5 runs were needed from 30 balls, and then he played that dreaded shot and was caught, and that was the end of it all. Pakistan lost.
But we are not that depressed about yesterday's game, after all it was a good match. Pakistan put up a good fight, and that's what important. :) :)